So you want to pick up and move halfway across the world. For… how long? TBD? Indefinite? With the man you’ve been just dating for a year or so? Oh, ok. No biggie.
That is not how that conversation will go.
Thinking about “breaking the news” to my parents that I’m even considering moving to Paris has me sweating. What if they say no? Don’t go? This is a terrible idea? Maybe they’ll say “fantastic!”
I have no idea.
I honestly, literally, completely have no idea how my parents (read: my mom) will react to me saying I’m thinking of moving to France.
My plan, though, is not to say I’m moving to France. It’s a simple 3-part plan that I think will soften the blow and ease them into the idea.
1. Say I’m considering it. No finality there, just something that has crossed my mind. Almost as a passing whim, barely even registered. Hardly a commitment to panic at.
2. Say I’m considering looking for a job in Paris. Not moving-to-be-with-the-love-of-my-life-I’ll-follow-him-anywhere. Clearly aiming to establish my own reasons and my own life. Never fear, parents, I’m my own independent person!
3. Say it’s not forever. Because it doesn’t have to be, and likely won’t be. A year or two is nothing. Time flies when you’re eating cheese. And that kind of interlude in a resume could be a fantastic opportunity.
That’s not so bad, right? I’m not chasing after a man, though he is the spark that could lead me to do this crazy thing. If you’ve always dreamt of doing something, but never had the guts or belief that you could do it, is it so bad if a partner is the instigator that makes it happen?
But why am I so nervous? Should I be? Is it a sign that I don’t believe in my own decision? Like when you’re a teenager and you don’t want to ask for something or tell your parents because you know they’ll be disappointed in you, or you know it’s a bad decision deep down.
I’m afraid that they’re going to disapprove of the idea, for sure. That they’ll think it’s a bad choice. I’m also afraid that they’ll ask me questions I don’t know how to answer. Or, worse, that they’ll ask me questions that I don’t want to answer. And. What if they’re right? What if they make solid arguments why it’s a bad idea and then I have to admit that they’re right and tell Frenchman that I can’t come with him to Paris and that we might not see each other again?
I don’t want that to happen.
I think I want to go to Paris.